[Tech1] Technical support

[techtone]

To be fair to Pat, I wasn't upset, as you may have gathered that I get an awful lot of emails from time to time, and whilst I've often previously seen quite a bit of the humour that arrives, I simply consign it to the trash. Say, how many in the trash are duplicates from Pat? Oo-er missus (Sorry Pat, that's an uncalled for response, but I would hope that all of us on this list have reached the stage where we can put up with each others foibles, and enjoy the range of views that ensue), Not forgetting lots of thanks to Bernie for putting up with it all too!

Meanwhile, here's one from my sister in Belfast which arrived today, I hope I'm in first with posting it to this list!
[IMG-20210617-WA0000.jpg]

TeaTeaFN - Tony

Sent with [ProtonMail](https://protonmail.com/) Secure Email.

‐‐‐‐‐‐‐ Original Message ‐‐‐‐‐‐‐
On Thursday, June 17th, 2021 at 13:03, geoff.hawkes134--- via Tech1 <tech1 at tech-ops.co.uk> wrote:

> The story was new to me too and it made me smile as it was well written and a humorous comment on life.
>
> As to what’s arisen in its wake, I know that age is said to bring an element of grumpiness and irascibility from which I’m guilty myself at times, but we need to remember to be patient with one another especially with what we put in print and try to avoid hurting people’s feelings.
>
> When we were at work I’m sure we all suffered from occasional stinging remarks and trespassed against others ourselves with hasty and ill-considered words or actions from which we walked away not realising the effect it had on the recipient.
>
> Now we’re older and should be wiser and more relaxed, let’s try to maintain the notional tea-bar friendly atmosphere in this forum - and if we have given offence, intentionally or otherwise, have the grace to admit it and apologise properly.
>
> Eating humble pie may not be the food of choice but when needed, there’s nothing so tasty and satisfying if restores friendships and clears the air,
>
> Here endeth today’s lesson,
>
> With kind regards to all,
>
> Geoff Hawkes
>
> From: Tech1 <tech1-bounces at tech-ops.co.uk> On Behalf Of Nick Ware via Tech1
> Sent: 17 June 2021 10:42
> To: tech1 at tech-ops.co.uk
> Subject: Re: [Tech1] Technical support
>
> ”Sorry,” doesn’t make your harsh put-down OK, Pat. I must remember to quote it back at you next time you re-tell one of your oft-repeated tales. It was new to me, and I daresay it amused plenty of others.
>
> Nick.
> Nick Ware - Sent from my iPad mini 5
>
>> On 16 Jun 2021, at 22:37, patheigham via Tech1 <tech1 at tech-ops.co.uk> wrote:
>
>> 
>>
>> Sorry, but that’s an old one.
>>
>> Pat
>>
>> Sent from [Mail](https://go.microsoft.com/fwlink/?LinkId=550986) for Windows 10
>>
>> From: [David Newbitt via Tech1](mailto:tech1 at tech-ops.co.uk)
>> Sent: 16 June 2021 22:03
>> Subject: Re: [Tech1] Technical support
>>
>> That’s an absolute gem Tony, I would expect many of us will be conspiring to give it wider coverage. Wit is priceless and this is genuine wit. Great stuff!
>>
>> Dave Newbitt.
>>
>> From: techtone via Tech1
>>
>> Sent: Wednesday, June 16, 2021 9:07 PM
>>
>> To: Tech-Ops-chit-chat
>>
>> Subject: [Tech1] Technical support
>>
>> I receive many emails from various friends around the world, with humorous content, which I pass on to my U3A friends. This one is my favourite for this year:
>>
>> The young woman who submitted the tech support message below (about her relationship to her husband) presumably did it as a joke. Then she got a reply that was way too good to keep to herself. The tech support people's love advice was hilarious and genius!
>>
>> The query:
>>
>> Dear Tech Support,
>>
>> Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
>>
>> In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as: NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.
>>
>> Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and House cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.
>>
>> Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
>>
>> What can I do?
>>
>> Signed: Desperate
>>
>> The response (that came weeks later out of the blue)...
>>
>> Dear Desperate,
>>
>> First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
>>
>> Please enter command: I thought you loved me.html and try to download Tears 6.2.
>>
>> Do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
>>
>> However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1.
>>
>> Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download Snoring Loudly Beta version.
>>
>> Whatever you do, DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Mother-In-Law 1.0 as it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.
>>
>> In addition, please do not attempt to re-install the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
>>
>> In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.
>>
>> You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0.
>>
>> Good Luck
>>
>> Tech Support Team.
>>
>> TeaTeaFN - Tony
>>
>> Sent with [ProtonMail](https://protonmail.com/) Secure Email.
>>
>> --
>> Tech1 mailing list
>> Tech1 at tech-ops.co.uk
>> http://tech-ops.co.uk/mailman/listinfo/tech1_tech-ops.co.uk
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